si arisona

fullday

hi baby,
hehe i know i haven't had the right to call you baby..you haven't developed that far..
today your mommy got a lot on her list..i'm not feeling to well today so i skipped the office..hehe the term is not as right as when used with school..i did a little cleaning at home *happycleaningelf..n i went to have statement letter from bca finance,the leasing company..since my tax is overdue.longstory short *cutting on story about traffic..i finish the task and went to a mall to have your daddy's present..tomorrow is his birthday..wrote this from the cell..pretty tiresome..well lesson for today is dont put up till tomorrow what you can do today..i know it sounded cliché but once you finish your task you will feel relieve and in a sense..there's a feeling of freedom involved..

dear baby,
ur mommy is not a strong woman..i'm not a good person..have done lots mistakes..wondering what good things i've done which made having you is a possibility..

changes?


ard two weeks ago i found out that im pregnant..allahu akbar..never thought i ever could be..
first reaction is overwhelmed gratitude towards Allah..next is that i really want to make this world better..

though this something within me is just growing..i already have so much to tell for this soon to be baby

Only Write When I'm Glum

NeverSayNever

heheh,, just got from twitter homepage,, peeps there been posting on things they said never, but eventually they're end up doing..

intermezzo : im tired trying to figure out how to put a subject for my post,, so going to give up for the moment

i had been an average student in my undergrad study, took accounting as major, and most of my peer was Chinese ethnicity, perhaps it got to do with their talent as seller? dunno and its actually not what i want to say,, hehehe... OFF TOPIC..

In accounting, there this subject of investment management, in an instance, I just don't like.. just don't.. it's..well just don't like it...we don't need a reason to not to like something, do we? I tried my best to avoid the subject and the related subject, thinking I will not pursue career in Investment, anyway.  So when I got C in my investment class, pure C, I mean the C because you don't study properly, not the C because the lecturer is a jerk...,, I do not care.. Just don't.. it's just.. I just,, well I just don't ok!,, we don't need a reason not to care,, do we? haha!btw the same hate-relationship applies to economics!

So I graduated from accounting from a respectable university (a bit uni-chauvinism wont hurt) and I got a job in a respectable firm as an auditor (again a bit show off wont hurt, rite? bwahahah), I worked in the Manufacturing Division, so there was no question of investment there.. But theeeeeennn, my parents want me to choose a more humane job (they think that going home at 2am in the morning is not human),, so I apply to this so-called respectable institution, and unfortunately got accepted.

Please note at that time, I did not know where they're going to place me..
They interviewed me and at that time I just found out I was going to be placed in reserve management..
I was 24, n pretty stupid I guess, I did not know what reserve management means!!
It turns out to be similar to treasury division in a commercial bank...

yup just do the math, treasury = investment + economics, DAMN!

but that's life, I mean,, God is might, God is just,, I just want to be thankful wherever I am..

ko ga bisa ada judulnya siihh?!!

pada ngeblog
gwe juga ahh

as usual sifat mo ikutaaaaann yg menang hehe

nu uhh.. none of my friends knows the existence of this blog anyway..
I'm sad..
In my whole I've never had somebody who truly wants me to be around them..
haha..
I don't mean to be a drama queen but just look at my friends..
never have them lasted..
I've lost contact with the elementary classmates..
never hang out with the junior's,,
guys in the senior years already have their own life, n no personal chit chat regroup whatsoever..

but what makes me real sad is I've lost my bestest friendss from college, without me really knowing what I did that pissed them so much..n me not knowing it, makes them pissed out even more.. :( I guess it's the little thing that I did..

then.. this month, I lost another friend,, this time I know clearly what I did.. but it's seems to be irreparable for him..

at first I thought, I'm not the one to be blame for losing best friends, but when the lightning strucked at the same place, haha can't deny it then.. it's all my bad

just now, I stumble upon me n my friends pictures in my old files, there were us..laughing..smiling.. oh how i miss the moments, really want to fix it..really want to have things the way they are but so impossible.. ive tried n give efforts to repair things, but they said it's not enough.. well then i guess it's true.. in the end, everybody will gets bored of me and leave me..

im bored..trying to write with a word processor but cant seem to find time to b able to sit n relax in front of the pc nowadays..u know with all the marriage no-helper he's-spoilt-n-me love-to-spoil-kind of thing..so let s see wheter this htc of me can help the situation since ive been envying friends who can explore n express their thoughts in their blog.. testing2?anyone can hear me?hope not coz i want to keep my writing just for myself

hiyyaa... watta day...

hoooooo...aaaa...heemmmm...
booooorrrreeeddd...

hohohoh...